How to Guess Someone's Love Language
Updated: Jan 10
Natz and I are online quiz junkies, so even before being together, we had already taken a free love language quiz online that helps you determine what your receiving love language is. It would be great if you AND your partner can take the test so you wouldn't have to guess someone's love language.
Unfortunately, it's a challenge for some to have their partner take a quiz, or even to directly ask. So, we are giving some tips to on how to "guess" someone's love language.
How To Guess Someone's Love Language
According to Dr. Chapman, we can "observe the way they express love to others, and analyze what they complain about most often and what they request from their significant other most often". One way to be able to guess someone's love language is to OBSERVE. Take a look at how this person responds to things (receiving) and how this person expresses (giving).
Be more observant of this person's actions (and even try to recall past experiences) and ask the following questions:
What is he/she usually asking for?
What is he/she usually calling out to be things that "you usually don't do"?
When in a good mood, what does he/she usually do for you?
What does he/she do when angry/lashing out?
There are just 5 love languages - so it will just take you one week (not even including the weekend) to try out one love language at a time & see which ones are most appreciated by your loved one! This is a greay way to guess someone's language -- because it's not so much guessing, but you actually get to decode your partner's receiving love language.
In case you are a visual learner, we talk about this in a bit more detail here (video in Tagalog/Filipino):
Guessing Your Own Love Language
Understanding your personal love language is not as complex as guessing someone's love language. You can usually get a hunch even without taking the test.
Do a retrospective on your life. Ask yourself:
What do I like doing for the people I love?
What do others do to me that make me feel the most loved?